Cancelled. All of them. The basketball and hockey and soccer and XFL. You are running out of options quickly. You have a better shot of beating keno than horse racing. You don’t know anything about rugby. That leaves you with few options, that itch right in the center of your back that you just cannot reach, and you need a way to scratch it. Fear not fellow degenerates, your fearless leader has you covered. It’s staring you right in the face; excitement, coaches who are mic’d up at every level, rivalries, and loud noises. NASCAR is right in front of you bringing you bets at 200 miles-per-hour!
NASCAR betting gives you more options than ever. This week alone on Draftkings (shoutout WildRose in Jefferson, I’m coming back for more of that Ruthie) you can bet on the race winner, top three finish, top five finish, top ten finish, stage winners, top car by manufacturer, best finish in groups, and matchups to name a few. Feels overwhelming at first but like going to the craps table and learning to bet the pass line first you can keep this really simple and fun. Here’s your opportunity to go meet your friends (less than 250 of them please) for a beer or two while you find some fun in something you didn’t know you would love.
There are a couple things you need to know in a NASCAR bar to keep safe. Jimmie Johnson is retiring so you can’t mock his farewell tour. Ricky Stenhouse is going to wreck someone. When he does you’ll say “oh fucking Wrecky Spinhouse” verifying you are a true NASCAR fan to the people around you and ensuring you fit in. Joey Logano will complain, Chase Elliott’s car will break, and EVERYONE hates Kyle Busch.
Now most importantly you want to know how to win money here and as promised it is easier to wager on racing than it appears. First of all we have the bet to win. It is the most fun; you’ll pick one driver to win the race. You will wonder why he is driving slow and getting four more new tires in 40 laps when you haven’t had to have them for four years. You will curse the jack man and wonder how someone doesn’t get all the fuel in the tank. The odds to win are pretty rewarding.
This week to win you might look at:
Chase Elliott +700: In only four races here he already has a top five and three top ten finishes. He has been fast this year and if his car hold together he is certainly worth a look.
Kevin Harvick +450: Harvick is your favorite here but when you can get over four to one on your money for a guy who has run the track 29 times and been in the top 10 14 times it is worth a look.
Brad Keselowski +650: 11 races here and he’s been top 10 seven times and top five four times. He and Harvick were both winners in one of the last two here and top five in their other.
Matchups are another easy one to follow during a race and with all you are looking for is your guy to be better than the other guy. This also means you can root for bad pit stops and (minor) wrecks from your opposition. Here are a couple to keep an eye on this week.
Martin Truex: 115 over Joey Logano-Truex has been on point this season and has performed well at this track historically. You also like his beard and that he doesn’t cry every time someone gets near him on the track.
Denny Hamlin +108 over Kyle Larson: This is a longer shot here for matchup racing but you get a lot of experience on the track with a guy who has seven top 10’s in 20 races.
Kyle Busch +100/even money over Kevin Harvick: Are you the heel? The kind of person who sees everyone wearing a Raiders shirt so you cheer for the Chiefs? This is your guy and you get even money. Rowdy is never out of a race until his car is in the trailer. If you take this bet please let @Jake_Vos_ know every lap that you are winning; he’s a big Busch fan and may not get a chance to see the race.
That’s it friends! NASCAR is ready for your action and it couldn’t be easier to pad your pocket. Times get tough but we will find a way to find a bet. So until we find our next one we will tell our friends that Good teams (drivers) win; great teams (drivers) cover.
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